“Where one door closes, another opens.”
Those words bring little comfort when you’re at a loss, but they’re true. This can apply to any aspect of our lives — personal and professional. There’s a purpose to these life-changing events. When you’re in the throes of your crisis, or series of crises, it’s hard to recognize this succession. In hindsight, it’s been my experience that this pattern is incredibly apparent.
It’s kind of difficult to be philosophical when your heart is being tossed into a Cuisinart. But as they say, time heals all wounds
Several years ago, I made a leap of faith as a result of being what I call “stupid in love” with a guy in Los Angeles, which was 400 miles away from where I lived at the time. After a year of spending a small fortune on the airline and phone companies, I decided to move. Within three carefully-planned months, I quit my perfectly good job and moved to be with him. Upon my arrival, with no immediate job prospect, I had the opportunity to start my own business. At the time, it was incredibly frightening because I was used to a steady paycheck every two weeks. But, by living frugally on savings for the first six months, I learned to adjust my sights a bit to accommodate a flexible income. By the way, the guy I moved for is history, but I’m now entering into my fifth successful year in business!
Granted, my “leap” was more calculated than when a person suddenly gets laid off like so many are these days. The floor just seems to fall out from underneath. I have a friend who had just recently been suddenly laid off from his job of five years. I could tell he was having difficulty adjusting to having so much time on his hands.
But, as I speak with him from time to time, I’m recognizing a Phoenix rising from the ashes. He’s experiencing personal growth. Several of his individual projects that had taken a back burner because of time constraints are taking on a whole new life. My friend is beginning to recognize this setback in his career as an opportunity to take a chance on his own creative merits….much like I did. I honestly believe that he’ll land on his feet at the very least — if not be an overwhelming success in his endeavors.
And, of course, on a personal level there’s also the relationship dynamic that applies here. God knows I’ve cried my eyes out over an unexpected breakup or even worse, an indiscretion. It’s kind of difficult to be philosophical when your heart is being tossed into a Cuisinart. But as they say, time heals all wounds. And good friends telling you what a Schlep he was helps, too. There will come a time, though, when the initial shock wears off, and you’ll be home alone scraping his good name off of the bottom of your stilettos for the umpteenth time. At this point, do you want to concentrate on the past — or the future? Don’t look at this event as an ending…. put your energy towards creating a new beginning.
So when certain things come to an end, even abruptly, we need to recognize these events for what they are: An opportunity to say goodbye and move on. Sure, a lot of lousy things happen to people, but a lot of good things can happen as a result, too. Is it possible that a given setback is merely an indication for laying new groundwork for the years to come?
I know that this sounds incredibly optimistic. However, when things like this happen to me, I have to look at them in retrospect and decide these events happen for a reason. And more often than not, it’s true, they do.